♟️ The Metagame #031: Knowing Your Audience

Whether you’re a teacher, a doctor, in sales, or playing poker, knowing your audience changes the way you behave.

Welcome back to The Metagame, a newsletter about understanding the intricacies of life to help give you the upper hand.

Here’s what’s in store for today:

• The Chameleon Effect

• Changing your flow

• Playing with the pros

Read time: 3 minutes

Have you ever noticed that you don’t speak the same way to everyone?

The way you talk to your best friend isn’t how you’d speak to your boss. You wouldn’t explain a concept to a five-year-old the same way you would to a group of industry experts.

And if you’ve ever played poker, you know that sitting at a table with amateurs (also known as fish) requires an entirely different strategy than playing against seasoned pros.

I like to call this subconscious ability to adapt our behavior based on our environment the Chameleon Effect.

It’s a phenomenon where we naturally mirror the speech patterns, body language, and energy of those around us.

Most of the time, we don’t even realize we’re doing it. It’s an instinctive social tool that helps us connect with others.

But when done consciously, it becomes a powerful skill.

Changing Your Flow

People might call this fake. But being a chameleon isn’t about lying or deceiving. It’s about being an effective communicator.

Every great speaker, salesperson, and leader share one thing in common: they know how to read the room.

They adjust their tone, wording, body language, and delivery to meet their audience.

• If they’re talking to a CEO, they get straight to the point.

• If they’re talking to a new hire, they might slow down and explain concepts more clearly.

• If they’re on stage, they amplify their energy to engage a crowd.

This isn’t manipulation—it’s communication done right.

The best communicators don’t just talk. They listen, they observe, and they adjust.

They understand that communication isn’t just about what you say—it’s about how it’s received.

And the more consciously you refine this skill, the more powerful it becomes.

Playing with the Pros

This concept clicked for me during a poker tournament.

I was playing against some regulars—experienced players who I’ve played with before.

Most of them have decent discipline and will fold when they sniff out danger. So when I bluffed, they believed me and folded.

But here’s the thing: if I had tried that same move against a beginner, it wouldn’t have worked.

Novices don’t fold as easily because they’re not thinking in terms of probability, pot odds, or patterns.

They’re gambling and just want to see what happens.

Bluffing against them is often a losing strategy. Instead, the best approach is to play straightforward—bet when you have a strong hand, go for maximum value, and avoid fancy shenanigans.

And what I learned at the poker table applies to communication in general.

If you’re explaining an idea to a five-year-old, you simplify. If you’re speaking to a group of experts, you use precise, technical language. If you’re persuading someone skeptical, you appeal to their logic.

Being an effective communicator isn’t about using the same strategy for every situation—it’s about recognizing who’s across the table and adjusting accordingly.

The Takeaway

Adapting to your audience isn’t fake. It’s how the best communicators, negotiators, and strategists operate.

The Chameleon Effect isn’t about deception—it’s about connection.

When you learn to read the room, match the energy, and speak in a way that resonates, you’re not being inauthentic. You’re being intentional.

So whether you’re sitting at a poker table, pitching an idea, or just having a conversation, remember: the best players—and the best communicators—don’t force their approach.

They adjust, adapt, and win.

Quote of the week

Thanks for reading!

If you have any questions, hit me up on LinkedIn or on 𝕏 at @sam_starkman, or feel free to reply to this email!

— Sam